Nothing beats that first cup of coffee in the morning. After a few sips of the scented magic drink, you’re suddenly awake and ready to take on the day. It is, without a doubt, the best.
Every coffee drinker, we believe, deserves a coffee quote. We’ve compiled a list of our favourite coffee quotations. Coffee quotes that are brilliant, attractive, and funny will enrich your coffee experience.
Let’s face it, there’s no better way to start the day than with a steaming cup of coffee. Coffee is a beverage that everyone enjoys. What better way to show your appreciation for coffee than with these creative and amusing coffee quotes?!
Types of Quotes
Funny Coffee Quotes That’ll Wake You Right Up
If you’ve arrived on this website, chances are you’re a coffee connoisseur who enjoys a cold brew, a latte, or a double shot of espresso. We’ve compiled up the most amusing coffee quotes and caffeine-related humour we could find on the internet in honour of International Coffee Day on September 29 (which we know you’ll be celebrating). Just make sure you’ve got a fresh pot on the stove: You’ll be ready to fill up your mug after reading through these lovely sayings.
- I have measured out my life with coffee spoons
- I don’t have enough coffee or middle fingers for today
- When you make it your habit to notice small moments of beauty, you caffeinated your spirit
- Oh, what a beautiful morning! Oh what a beautiful day. I’m drinking this whole pot of coffee. You better stay out of my way!
- Want to hear a really dark joke?…Decaf
- Coffee! Because anger management is too expensive
- The fact is, I don’t know where my ideas come from. Nor does any writer. The only real answer is to drink way too much coffee and buy yourself a desk that doesn’t collapse when you eat your head against it.
- Dontcha wish your coffee was hot like me?
- To make me happy: Make me coffee, bring me coffee, be coffee….coffee
- Shoutout to wifi, coffee and ambition
- A bad day with coffee is better than a good day without it
- Shhhh, don’t disturb me, I’m busy changing coffee into badassery
Inspirational Coffee Quotes
After you’ve finished scrolling through this list, don’t forget to look at our recommended coffee subscriptions and our list of tried-and-true coffee accessories. Trust us when we say that the coffee enthusiast in your life will be overjoyed. They, after all, enjoy their morning cup(s) as much as you do.
- Instant Human! Just add coffee
- Why, yes, I could start my day without coffee. But I like being able to remember things like how to say words and put on pants
- Coffee, because crack isn’t accepted in the workplace
- Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.
- I put coffee in my coffee
- It is the folly of too many to mistake the echo of a London coffee-house for the voice of the kingdom.
- Good communication is just as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after.
- He was my cream, and I was his coffee – And when you poured us together, it was something.
- I never drink coffee at lunch. I find it keeps me awake for the afternoon.
- Friends bring happiness into your life. Best friends bring coffee.
- Why did the hipster burn his tongue? Because he drank his coffee before it was cool
- Coffee, because it’s too early for wine
- Coffee is a language in itself
- I wake up some mornings and sit and have my coffee and look out at my beautiful garden, and I go, ’Remember how good this is. Because you can lose it.’
- Townes van Zandt is the best songwriter in the whole world and I’ll stand on Bob Dylan’s coffee table in my cowboy boots and say that.
- Coffee, because crack is bad for you
Morning Coffee Quotes
When Jean-Jacques Rousseau, another renowned Enlightenment philosopher, died, it was stated that “he narrowly missed doing it with a cup of coffee in his hand.”
Some of my favourite famous (and even infamous) coffee phrases, painstakingly saved for posterity, are included here. Let’s see how many “Cs” I can cram into a single paragraph…
- When I wake up in the morning, I just can’t get started until I’ve had that first, piping hot pot of coffee. Oh, I’ve tried other enemas.
- A 41-inch bust and a lot of perseverance will get you more than a cup of coffee – a lot more.
- AM- Coffee…PM- Still coffee
- If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee.
- I love my Saturday coffee the way I used to love Saturday morning cartoons
- I like my coffee like I like myself: strong, sweet, and too hot for you
- Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank.
- I love it when the coffee kicks in and I realize what an adorable badass I’m going to be today
- It’s amazing how the world begins to change through the eyes of a cup of coffee.
- Sometimes I go hours without drinking coffee…it’s called sleeping
- I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time.
- Cigarettes and coffee: an alcoholic’s best friend!
- Decaf coffee only works if you throw it at people
- I judge a restaurant by the bread and the coffee.
- Coffee is the best medicine
- I will start working when my coffee does
Coffee Quotes And Me
True love can be found in a variety of unconventional settings these days, including online, at a bar, or on a blind date. A true coffee lover, on the other hand, finds the relationship they desire and need every morning (and sometimes afternoon and night!) at the bottom of their beloved mug. People seem to be divided by their coffee preferences, which include black, cream, sugar, foam, and no foam. It appears that people LOVE their coffee and will not budge on changing it.
- Our culture runs on coffee and gasoline, the first often tasting like the second.
- If I were a wizard, I’m pretty sure my Patronus would be coffee
- Sometimes you gotta drink some coffee, put on some rock n’ roll, and handle your business
- May your coffee be strong, and your Monday be short
- Coffee helps me be less Brittney-2007
- Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard.
- I eat salad everyday. Bean salad…Coffee bean salad…Coffee. I drink coffee everyday
- I pretend coffee helps, but I’m still a bitch
- When life gives you lemons, trade them for coffee
- I like my coffee like I like my women. In a plastic cup.
- Coffee, then adulting
- To me, the smell of fresh-made coffee is one of the greatest inventions.
- Three cups of coffee a day, keeps the doctor away!
- Kids are meeting in coffee shops and basements figuring out what’s unsustainable in their communities. That’s the future.
- I’ll quit coffee. It won’t be easy drinking my Bailey’s straight, but I’ll get used to it. It’ll still be the best part of waking up.
- Patience is the time between drinking a cup of coffee and the motivation to begin your day
- A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.
- In dog coffees, I’ve only had one
- May your coffee be stronger than your toddler
- It’s strange how drinking 8 cups of water seems impossible but 8 cups of coffee go down like a chubby kid on a see-saw
Coffee Lover Quotes Funny
You pack whatever you have ground up or in a pod into your trusty thermos or travel mug and head out for the day. So, if you’re one of those people who wants to develop a greater love and appreciation for one of God’s best beverages, go no further than these quotes. And if you’re wondering what to get your coffee-obsessed friend or family member, look no further than our gift guide for coffee lovers!
- I was taken by the power that savoring a simple cup of coffee can have to connect people and create community
- A girl in a bikini is like having a loaded pistol on your coffee table – There’s nothing wrong with them, but it’s hard to stop thinking about it.
- I judge a restaurant by the bread and by the coffee.
- Science may never come up with a better office communication system than the coffee break.
- Do you know how helpless you feel if you have a full cup of coffee in your hand and you start to sneeze?
- Love is in the air, and it smells like coffee.
- Coffee is always a good idea
- The morning cup of coffee has an exhilaration about it which the cheering influence of the afternoon or evening cup of tea cannot be expected to reproduce.
- Here’s to all the people who remain unharmed because I have coffee and a sense of humor
- A real prince brings coffee
- I just like coffee, coffee is my favorite
- I don’t need to drink coffee to be awesome. I’m already awesome. But it’s more fun when I’m awesome and awake.
- I want someone to look at me the way I look at coffee
- Coffee is a hug in a mug
- Come here you giant cup of beautiful coffee and lie to me about how much were going to get done today
Sassy Coffee Quotes
Coffee and quotes are two things that the entire world adores. The best coffee quotes have been compiled here. These are the finest, funniest, and most intelligent coffee quotations…
- If you are not coffee, chocolate or bacon, I’m going to need you to go away
- Coffee with a friend is like capturing happiness in a cup.
- The most dangerous drinking game is seeing how long I can go without coffee
- When that first sip of coffee touches your soul…
- Women aren’t supposed to make coffee…the Bible says, “He-brews”
- I don’t need an inspirational quote, what I need is a freaking cup of coffee
- When my blood runs black as the moonless night, and my heartbeat sounds as the warriors’ march, only then may you say, I’ve had enough coffee
- Like everyone else who makes the mistake of getting older, I begin each day with coffee and obituaries.
- Life without coffee is like something without something…sorry, I haven’t had any coffee yet
- Coffeeology: Espresso yourself. So many blends, so little time. Take life one sip at a time, and stay grounded. Better latte than never. Take time to smell the cover
- Coffee, the favorite drink of the civilized world.
- Without my morning coffee, I’m just like a dried-up piece of goat.
- Life is what happens between coffee and wine
- With enough coffee, I can dress myself and use my grown up manners
- My birthstone is a coffee bean
- I have measured out my life with coffee spoons.
- Procaffeinating: The tendency to not start anything until you’ve had a cup of coffee
- Tobacco, coffee, alcohol, hashish, prussic acid, strychnine, are weak dilutions. The surest poison is time.
- Life happens, coffee helps
- Humanity runs on coffee.
- There is no use crying over spilled milk…spilled coffee however, may get you stabbed
- Too much coffee. Too much coffee and Gatorade. It’s a hell of a mix. If you’re ever tired in the morning, just try that mix, and tell me what you think.
- This house runs on love, laughter and a whole lot of coffee.
- I’ve had so much coffee today I can see noises
Coffee Ride Quotes
Voltaire was one among the most passionate and loud supporters of this stimulating beverage among the French literati. He was said to drink between 50 and 72 cups of coffee every day and lived to be 83 years old! He evidently disregarded his doctor’s advice that his coffee addiction would lead to his premature death. In fact, in response to the heretical allegation that coffee was a slow poison, Voltaire responded, “I believe it must be, for I’ve been drinking it for eighty-five years and am still alive.”
- Way too much coffee. But if it weren’t for the coffee, I’d have no identifiable personality whatsoever.
- You should know that before 10am, no matter what the question is, my answer is always coffee
- Coffee, coffee! It’s our drink! If we don’t get it, we can’t think!
- Coffee; because hating your job should be done with enthusiasm
- Coffee is the common man’s gold, and like gold, it brings to every person the feeling of luxury and nobility.
- Coffee helps me maintain my “never killed anyone streak”
- The only time it’s acceptable to watch a barista at the bar is when you compliment their skills. “You’re so boss.”
- Coffee isn’t a drug it’s a vitamin.
- Coffee should be black as hell, strong as death and sweet as love.
- Coffee helps me person, personing is hard without caffeine
- What goes best with a cup of coffee? Another cup
- But even a bad cup of coffee is better than no coffee at all. New York has great water for coffee.
- Coffee is the gasoline of life
- Behind every successful woman is a substantial amount of coffee.
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